[Schultz1]

Then he could read me bedtime stories.


If Gary ran out of stories to tell forever.

[Bull]

then the world would become a much more depressing place.

If Gary told your life story ...

[GaryO]

Then these idiots over on politifake would would walk around with permanent erections.

If you had to take an IQ test before you're allowed to procreate ...

Hey, this looks like a fun game

If my aged brain wasn’t so clogged with important things like Adult Swim

‘permanent erections’…HAH
If they had penises

[Schultz1]

Then we need lots of viagra.



If the Falkland islands were still under control of Argentinians

[Rick69]

Then Britain would still do absolutely fcuk all about it...

If Pwissy was, in fact, a professor in the field of human psychology with distinction...

[spypengen]

the the whole world is a lie

if you found your mother dead on a sidewalk

[Bull]

then I guess I'd have to go buy a suit.

If you could travel backwards in time to a specific date but could never return ...

[fan4camping]

Then I would decide which mistake in my life I wanted to rectify, and go back to that point.

If you woke up to find that 99% of the world population was gone, nothing electrical or electronic worked,
and the air smelled like a really bad fart.

[M0rd3kaI]

Then it will be enough reason to invent the internet again and make MotiFake... just to blow the screen open with a shotgun followed by my own face...

IF you met a psychopath that was constantly sniffing your shoulder...

[Rick69]

I'd say, "Kai, if you wouldn't mind, please could you refrain from sniffing my shoulder... I mean, you haven't even brushed in a week... Or washed in a month..."


If an orangutan appeared on your doorstep and began sleeping right there...