[M0rd3kaI]

That is a classic... I have to admit... that is just classic

I still want to open the door with a white T-shirt stained in animal blood and bodily fluids with a large knife and sweat running down my face and breathing as if rushing something and ask: "WHAT" with a demented look on my face.

So far I have only known of mormons in the movies (S.W.A.T. with Collin Farrell)

[GaryO]

My mom had the best response I ever saw. She'd glance out the window, see it was "them" pull off all her clothes, and open the door with nothing but a smile.

"I'd love to hear what you have to say, come on in, just leave your clothes on the front steps. Ring the doorbell when you're ready!"

Strangely, after a couple of times of this, visits by the Jehovah's witnesses stopped.

I think the mormons marked us as a favorite, though.

AH!

Glance out the window first

The girl scouts don’t come to the door anymore

[misterhamtastic]

Bwahahaha! Awesome.

The girl scouts have always scared me. I have 3 daughters, 11, 11, and 8. The twins wanted to try the scouts for a couple of visits, so I took them.

They met in a little powered storage building at the far end of the parks and rec area here. They went in and jumped around and then did crafts and such. I sat on the bench outside and smoked a cig and did a little writing.

The mothers of the other 5 little girls(this was years ago, so I guess they were all 7 or , were standing behind me against the wall.

I ignored them, but their conversation kept crawling into my head until I stopped writing and just listened. I was amazed. Apparently, two girls that were normally there were not, so they were glad they had the "throwaways". These ladies went on to discuss the two "new" kids, their clothes, the fact that they didn't seem popular at school, and went on to discuss their probable parents status in society, going so far as to suggest that the children were dropped off by an uncaring father who looked like a mass murderer.

I didn't move. Didn't breathe a word. I looked at my watch and waited the next 10 minutes until the meeting was over. I watched the women press into the little place and chit-chat in there with the troop leader. My daughters were gathering their things, a picture and a little craft. I walked in smiled, hugged them both, made a fuss over their work. Then I went to the cluster around the troop leader.

"Thanks for letting us try it out." I said.

"Well, we hope you'll come back," she said with a smile.

Now I'm a big guy. 6'7" tall, 270 lbs. I stepped in close to their huddle... real close to the ladies who had the talk behind me were, and they got quiet, expecting some conspiratorial thing or something.

I said,"The kids are great, and I think your organization is great, but it seems I have discovered that this organization supports people's ideas about who is better than whom, and unfounded gossiping about people if they think they're not around. So, no thanks. My daughters will join the Hell's Angels first."

I stood, smiled, and said,"But keep our address on the cookie list. We love the cookies."

I looked at the women who appeared shocked. I smiled brightly, and gathered up the girls and brought them home.

I only buy the cookies from the kids, by the way.

[M0rd3kaI]

I only buy the cookies from the kids, by the way.

Hmmm... we have a paedophile here ladies and gents ... I think you'll fit in here just fine

To get to your story... that is a nice one, I really enjoyed it and if I can say something... Brilliant job in the 'what to say; when to say it' department... "Hells Angels" Fcuking lol

[misterhamtastic]

lol. Ass. The mom's are usually the ones trying to sell the cookies at the grocery store, and I avoid them. lol

3 years later. One wants to be a freaking brain surgeon. One wants to WRITE movies. Their friends are generally the "less popular" girls. And boys are still "icky".

Funny, from what they say, all the girl scouts have boyfriends. I think I made the right choice. ;)

[M0rd3kaI]

Ass?? ASS?!!? Sir... I object to your incompetence... if you were to look to the left of your screen and look closely enough at my avatar... you might see a monkey in there somewhere... I am not a donkey, I take heavy offence to that... now where's my blanky

Motherly instincts overwhelmed you I s'ppose... maybe to make up for the gossiping wombs... but perhaps for another reason... the sex change you underwent when you were 26... yeah, it came out eventually.

Good choice though, I always like a... wait, as I know women, maybe they only hide the fact that they are going out at night..... wait, these are your kids... oh well, the thought crossed your mind already, I can see you running out to barricade their windows and deadbolt their doors before even getting this far with the post... allowing me to fully say that I am enjoying the humour and the twisted thoughts my mind can come up with...

[misterhamtastic]

I'm thinking of investing in these should I become worried about such things.

Oh, and sorry about that. Monkey, yes. I am not incontinent, though.

[M0rd3kaI]

You'll learn that most of my posts have seriousness in them, however, not everything I say, I mean in another way than sarcasm and getting a laugh out there...

Hmmm... Chastity belt... nice... I've actually heard of a vaginal condom-type thing that has inward facing spikes, on the first 'backstroke' he would give, those spikes would pierce his penis from tip to base... and these 'spikes' need to be surgically removed...

[GaryO]

I'm thinking of investing in these should I become worried about such things.

Oh, and sorry about that. Monkey, yes. I am not incontinent, though.

Miham



Let’s getcha started in the right direction.

Do yer best to stay on topic.
I read somewhere that you write.
Put it here, all you want.
I like yer stories, lots.
Keep ‘em comin’

cheers

[rerun]

Bwahahaha! Awesome.

The girl scouts have always scared me. I have 3 daughters, 11, 11, and 8. The twins wanted to try the scouts for a couple of visits, so I took them.

They met in a little powered storage building at the far end of the parks and rec area here. They went in and jumped around and then did crafts and such. I sat on the bench outside and smoked a cig and did a little writing.

The mothers of the other 5 little girls(this was years ago, so I guess they were all 7 or , were standing behind me against the wall.

I ignored them, but their conversation kept crawling into my head until I stopped writing and just listened. I was amazed. Apparently, two girls that were normally there were not, so they were glad they had the "throwaways". These ladies went on to discuss the two "new" kids, their clothes, the fact that they didn't seem popular at school, and went on to discuss their probable parents status in society, going so far as to suggest that the children were dropped off by an uncaring father who looked like a mass murderer.

I didn't move. Didn't breathe a word. I looked at my watch and waited the next 10 minutes until the meeting was over. I watched the women press into the little place and chit-chat in there with the troop leader. My daughters were gathering their things, a picture and a little craft. I walked in smiled, hugged them both, made a fuss over their work. Then I went to the cluster around the troop leader.

"Thanks for letting us try it out." I said.

"Well, we hope you'll come back," she said with a smile.

Now I'm a big guy. 6'7" tall, 270 lbs. I stepped in close to their huddle... real close to the ladies who had the talk behind me were, and they got quiet, expecting some conspiratorial thing or something.

I said,"The kids are great, and I think your organization is great, but it seems I have discovered that this organization supports people's ideas about who is better than whom, and unfounded gossiping about people if they think they're not around. So, no thanks. My daughters will join the Hell's Angels first."

I stood, smiled, and said,"But keep our address on the cookie list. We love the cookies."

I looked at the women who appeared shocked. I smiled brightly, and gathered up the girls and brought them home.

I only buy the cookies from the kids, by the way.

you are pretty quick on your feet. I would have thought of saying almost the exact thing (after stewing on the conversation for a few hours, or days)