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Conductor Sir Thomas Beecham once led a spectacular production of "Aida" at the Royal Opera in London. Featured in the cast was a live elephant. During its big moment in the "Triumphal March" scene, the elephant took a dump on the stage. Beecham turned to the audience and quipped, "Everybody's a critic!"
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Sometimes you have to pretend you won't be around when they want to come and visit.
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