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NICE TRY - You thought you could escape from the kitchen didn't you?
CLINT EASTWOOD - The Boogie Man may check his closet for Chuck Norris, but Chuck Norris checks under his bed for Clint Eastwood.
IN SOVIET RUSSIA - Dance breaks YOU!
THE NUTCRACKER - Toy soldiers battle the rats, you uncultured swine
THERE IS ALWAYS - Someone better than you
JABBA AND JUNE - Luke and Leia weren't the only twins separated at birth
REDNECK MURDERS - Usually go unsolved because 1. There are no dental records 2. All the DNA matches
LIFE IS LIKE JALAPENOS - What you do today may burn your ass tomorrow ...
A WILD SNORLAX APPEARS! - It uses Bodyslam. Its super effective! You Balck Out.
WHO WANTS TO LIVE FOREVER? -
THE HOLY MORTAR ROUND - of Antioch is on it's way
GREAT HUNT -
AND WE COULDN'T WAIT TO GROW UP -
THIS IS A HERO. - Not a sports player. Not a politician. Not a faddish popular figure. A hero faces death for others, with no thought of personal gain or glory. This is the face of a true hero.
NO MATTER HOW BUSY YOU ARE -
MONDAY - Is a horrible way To spend the 1/7 Of your life
IMAGINE THAT -
SECURITY PLANS - When people get one too many ideas from watching too much Dexter...
THE CAKE IS NOT A LIE - If I'm wrong, may God strike me dead.
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